The main focus of this blog has been to document the remodel of our home, but for anyone who has been reading for a while you know it’s about our family too.

Last Saturday, Felix was hit by a car. We weren’t home when it happened, but the driver (who was absolutely devastated) got a hold of us by calling the number on his tag. It was a quiet drive back and when we got home we buried him in the backyard. We wanted Bailey to try to understand what had happened so we included him in the process. Afterwards, the three of us curled up in bed where we stayed most of the day.

We had Felix for less than a year. He was an abandoned kitten who had spent the first several weeks of his life outdoors before we adopted him. As much as we tried, he was just not meant to be an indoor cat. As he grew into a mature cat he became increasingly destructive and unfriendly, with too much energy to stay inside all day. So a couple of months ago we started letting him outdoors and despite everything, I know that those few months were the happiest of his life. During that time, we watched him become a sweet and playful cat who mostly stayed in our yard and no longer picked on Bailey. He had just started chasing birds, so maybe he followed one into the street. Or maybe the driver was distracted. We’ll never know for sure, but we’re definitely going to miss that little guy. As a way to say goodbye we decided to repost some of our favorite photos from his short life…

We’re doing better now, but the sadness is still there. It’s so incredibly hard to lose a pet.


100 Responses to “felix”

  1. Leslie Lowe says:

    So sorry! I have been there myself and i know how much it hurts. Sending you a virtual hug.

  2. David says:

    I’m so sorry. I have lost pets I love, too. It is so hard.

  3. I just lost a pet a while ago, it is definitely hard, but time will pass and it’ll get better. It will turn into happy memories. 🙂 Beautifully written and those pictures are adorable.

  4. artfingers25 says:

    I felt my eyes waters. I had the same experience few times with my pets. No matter how many days we were together, it was always hard to accept, especially when it was all so sudden like what happened to Felix. Condolence to you n fam.

  5. Emilie says:

    This is a very sad news. I always enjoy reading your posts and see your reno progressing, with the help of Felix and Bailey! Felix had a great life with you and all these adorable pictures will one day only bring a smile and not a wave of sadness.

  6. Do some cats and dogs get on all right living with each other then; yours seem fine?

  7. I’m so sorry for your loss. When my dog died of cancer 4 months ago, I was devastated–it was one of the most awful things I’ve been through, and I’ve had my share of tragedy–so I know what you are going through. I’m sure Bailey will be glad when the baby arrives, and I’m excited for the three of you.

    • chezerbey says:

      Aww, I’m so sorry about your dog. =( Maybe it’s b/c they’re so dependent on us or that their lives are never as long as they should be, but it always breaks my heart to hear about the loss of a pet.

  8. Dawn Moore says:

    Felix wandered into your life as a little furry gift. Now he’s wandered out. You all were blessed to have one another for however long. Bailey will guide you through.

  9. Isabelle says:

    Bye, bye Felix – from the photos it seems you were a beautiful cat and loved truely by the three ones you lived with. Too sad, that it had to be over so soon. Hope you feel fine, where you are now, and I am sure you will be missed.

  10. Ben says:

    This is the first time that I am writing a comment, although I have been following your blog for quite some time now. I am so sorry for your loss! We have a cat (Emile) that looks just like Felix, although she is a little older. And at a certain point in her life, we also decided to let her go outside, I guess pretty much for the same reasons as you guys, and her personality changed completely. Eventhough Felix is no longer with you, I want to reassure you that you have made the right decision – however short it may have been, there is no doubt in my mind that he has had the best life that a cat can wish for. All the best to you for the future. We also happen to have a little daughter – she is 6 months now – and trust me, it will be an amazing experience (despite the sleep deprivation…).

    • chezerbey says:

      Thanks Ben, I really appreciate the comment. I have also thought about the timing of everything and (as cheesy as it may sound) the circle of life and how one day we’ll tell her about the kitty we used to have that died right before she was born.

  11. I’m so sorry for your loss. Losing a pet, especially suddenly like that, is so hard. I’m praying for you and your family.

  12. coasterkim says:

    I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s never easy to lose a pet but to do so suddenly like that…it’s rough. I’m praying for you and your family.

  13. Dusa says:

    *sniff* As a confirmed cat owner, I was always happy when I saw a post with felix in it. I’m so sorry! I know you had reservations about a kitty back in the day when he first showed up, but he grew on you, and became on of the “Three Muskateers” boys in your home. Hugs to all of you!

  14. Jo in NZ says:

    Oh my, I am bawling my eyes out. What a sweety he was, and what a short life. Your portrait of Felix (both photos and words) are beautiful. I lost a young cat in a similar way some years ago and it was a very painful loss, made no less real by the fact that our relationship was not verbal. So sorry for you guys. A friend said to me at the time, maybe Cooper’s last thought before crossing the road was “I wonder what’s over there?” I liked that. Bright blessings xxx

  15. Maisie says:

    I’m so sorry to hear about Felix. A little tear crept to the corner of my eye 🙁
    You gave him a lovely home, a furry warm friend to snuggle with and as you said the happiest times of his love. Hugs.

  16. I’m so sorry to read about Felix, may he rest in peace.

  17. EmilyR says:

    A loss of a pet is so hard. I just had to put down my Zoey not too long ago. I agree – an outdoor cat is a happy cat. Felix was beautiful.

  18. Melissa says:

    So sorry to hear about Felix but it’s nice to know he was probably doing something like chasing a bird when he was hit.

  19. Nat says:

    I can absolutely relate. I fought for a long time not to let our cat out. But he too is just not meant to be a house cat. I’m sure Felix was happiest when he was outside. I’m really sorry for the little fur ball. He was adorable.

  20. frugalnature says:

    That is just the worst, so sorry…though, you made the right choice letting him outside. Terrible things like this may happen, but we still must allow our animals to be animals and live their lives. Here’s hoping that time will ease the pain of losing your little one.

  21. Elisa says:

    I’m so sorry. I’ve always had cats — they’ll mostly choose whether they’ll be indoor or outdoor, and I am hands down quality over quantity, I’m just sorry your boy had to go so soon.

  22. Mariane says:

    I am so sorry for your lost. All the best to Bailey and you guys.

  23. RIP Felix! It sounds like you gave him a wonderful life. He looks so happy in the photos. Thinking of you today!

  24. stephiec1024 says:

    I’m sorry to hear this. We lost our dear sweet Nita about a month ago, and we miss her so much. We find happiness that we were able to rescue her from the Animal Control Center and give her a place to run and chase birds.

  25. Tyler Murphy says:

    VERY sorry for your loss. Hope things can soon return to normal for you guys. It’s great that you have some nice photos to remember him.

  26. So sorry for your loss. I’ve had several stray turned indoor/outdoor cats over the years who also just NEEDED to be outside. What happened to Felix was a tragic accident. Don’t beat yourself up over it. You saved him and helped him have a great life.

  27. sadie says:

    I am so sorry. I’ve, luckily, never lost a pet suddenly like that, but I have been blindsided by an aggressive illness which took my Peaches overnight. My sympathies and condolences.

  28. kari says:

    I’ve been reading your blog for about a year and I didn’t know I could feel such sadness for a family I’d never met but such beautiful cat, you gave him a good life. I’m so sorry your time with him was short.

  29. Oh, I’m so, so, so sorry about Felix, you guys. Big hugs to you both and Bailey, too. xoxo

  30. Maya says:

    oh guys,
    i am so sorry! hugs to all three of you!

  31. katie says:

    i am so sorry to read about felix. it is hard to lose a pet, esp. when it’s so sudden. when our reese died i had a very difficult time dealing with it, but it does get better. we made sure to focus on the happy times, and i know that his life was full, even if he was taken away too soon.

    my thoughts are with you, give bailey extra hugs.

    • chezerbey says:

      Thanks Katie. To be totally honest, I don’t know what what we will do when it’s Bailey. Everytime we here about a golden dying early it’s a painful reminder that he won’t be here forever.

  32. InMadison says:

    I’m so sorry to read this! How is Bailey doing? It’s terrible to lose a pet.

    • chezerbey says:

      Bailey seems ok, but I’m not sure he understands yet. He seemed to get it during the burial but he’s also such a happy-go-lucky dog that maybe it’s not affecting him as much.

  33. Michel says:

    Very sorry to hear about your loss, losing a pet is the hardest. Hoping he is in a good place and wishing you all the best in the weeks to come!

  34. Brandi says:

    So sorry for the loss of your sweet Felix 🙁

  35. dayna says:

    I am so sorry about Felix. This post made me cry. It is so sad to lose a pet when they are so much a part of your life.

  36. Wow, I had a much more emotional response than I expected to this, probably because my life is consumed by home renovation, our newish (almost 8 month old) baby, and our three “inherited” (a pregnant mama cat was living under our house when we bought it) cats– much like you.

    We normally lock our cats in at night, but we were out of town all last week, and I caved to the guilt of locking them in the house for so long and left the cat door unlocked so they could roam. I used it as an excuse to buy an IP cam and pointed it at the food bowls so I could make sure I saw them once a day (and, almost as importantly, to make sure that I didn’t see any raccoons).

    Every morning I anxiously flipped through the hours, and twice I didn’t see Inkwell, our “Felix” (first one out in the morning, last one in at night, two high-altitude rescues so far), in the 24-hour loop and had to call my Dad to stop by and make sure she was around. Both times I held my breath until he called, already half-cursing myself for not just locking them in. And both times she was fine.

    I’m sure you feel terribly responsible– that if you hadn’t allowed him to roam that he’d still be with you. But that’s no way to live, even for a “housecat.” Our cats mope around the house on rainy days (well, except Inkwell, she’s an all-weather cat) and knowing all of the risks out there I still can’t imagine keeping them locked in.

    Yes, you made the decision to let him roam, but that’s not what killed him– what killed him was very bad luck. Some day, we’re going to be confronted with the same dilemma with our children, and we’ll make the same decision, the right one, despite the risks.

    I’m so sorry for your loss. All of your readers are going to miss him too.

    • chezerbey says:

      Thanks Matt, sounds like we have many of the same emotions going on right now! Thank you for your thoughtful comment and I know just what you mean about having to make the hard decisions about what’s best for the ones we love. I know I’ll have to face similar dilemmas in the months and years to come with our little one.

  37. LauraC says:

    So, so sorry to hear of the loss of Felix. I certainly know the pain of loosing a pet, and my heart goes out to you right now.

  38. Heather says:

    I’m so sorry. Losing pets is the worst. My sister and I can still get each other crying if we talk about the dog we lost 20 years ago. You did a wonderful thing by giving him a home and paying attention to his needs.

    • chezerbey says:

      Aww, I know…my childhood dog died about 7-8 years ago and I’m still sad about it. They definitely fill a special place in our hearts!

  39. Lee says:

    My deepest sympathies to your family. I know how hard it is to lose a furry member of the family. Hug Bailey on my behalf (I bet he misses the cat a lot).

  40. katy gray says:

    Oh no, I’m so so sorry! It really is the hardest thing to lose a pet, especially when it’s so unexpected – I still cry about my dog that died a year and a half ago. Big hugs from Jackson WY.

  41. Chris says:

    So sad. It must have been a terrible phone call to get, but credit to the driver for doing the right thing when they must have felt awful. Otherwise you might never have known what happened. Felix has crossed over the rainbow bridge now.

  42. Chantel I. says:

    I’m so sorry. Felix was such a little darling. You did right by him, regardless of the consequences, and I’m sure his short life was better for it. Much love to you and your family.

  43. ungood says:

    my condolences to you and your family. it sounds like felix was living a good life until he died, and you were able to provide that for him.

  44. Colin says:

    Your photos and stories of Felix brought me many smiles and laughs – I was often showing pictures of Felix to my boyfriend because I just had to share the joy! He will be missed and I extend my sympathies to you all. His mischievous spirit will live on in you.

  45. Ana says:

    So sorry for your loss. A pet is not just a pet it’s family. My thoughts are with you.

  46. Ana says:

    So Sorry for your loss. A pet is not just a pet, it’s family.

  47. melanie c says:

    ahhhh tears at work…. he looks just like my kitties and i can’t even imagine what you’re going through. so many life events for you guys! my thoughts are with you!

  48. ACakeStory says:

    I’m going to cry. I just lost a pet recently and I know how hard it is. But how wonderful that you had so many happy memories and you got to love this kitty. It will get easier day by day. 🙂

  49. Nancy S says:

    You gave him a wonderful life, that’s what counts. My own are indoor/outdoor. Don’t knock yourself for letting him be happy. And thumbs up to the driver that made the phone call, I’m sure that was hard. ((hugs))

  50. Marie says:

    So sorry for your loss! Felix was very lucky to have found your family. Felix’s life was too short but you gave Felix a home and love – I think rescued pets knows how special that is. I am glad you have such beautiful photos to remember those special times you spent together. My thoughts are with you during this hard time.

  51. Oh no! I’m so sorry for your family’s loss.

  52. Renee says:

    I’m so sorry for your loss with Felix. I read your blog all the time and today my heart jumped in to my throat…i’m very sorry. Felix seemed like a pretty cool Pacific Northwest kitty… Sending you and bailey virtual hugs..take care!

  53. Gaidig says:

    I’m so sorry you lost your sweet little Felix. *hugs*

  54. I’m so sorry! It’s so hard to lose a pet.

  55. allisonandres says:

    I’m so sorry to hear about felix. Close friends of mine have lost 2 cats to cars and it just breaks my heart. Sending you all hugs and warm thoughts.

  56. Bree says:

    I am so sorry. It is -never- easy to lose a pet, but it makes it so much harder when their lives are cut so short and so unexpectedly. My heart goes out to all three of you.

  57. casacaudill says:

    I’m so sorry. 🙁

  58. Kari says:

    I’m so sorry. He had a better life than he could have ever asked for. To have a family care for him, love him, provide for him, and to give him an enjoyable life is every kitty’s dream. I am so sad for you, but know that Felix is just waiting for you around the bend – to sit in your lap and purr and play with you again.

  59. Kathy says:

    I am so sorry. I just lost my dog Jenny this week, too, so I know all too well what you’re going through right now. I had her for 18 years. 18 years or 18 weeks, and everywhere in between, it’s so incredibly hard.

  60. Britten says:

    I’m so sorry for your loss. We went through the same indoor vs outdoor struggle with our cat Loki. I tried keeping her outside on a leash and found her hanging unconscious from a tree branch when her break-away collar failed to break-away. Ever since then we’ve allowed her outside during the day and it’s been scary. She’s had her tail broken by a neighbor dog and occassionally been attacked by a stray cat. But she’s happiest when she’s outside so I remind myself that living ten years longer by staying inside is not really “living”. Felix may have had a short life but I am confident you made the right choices for him and that he could not have asked for a better life.

  61. Erin says:

    I was so sorry to read about Felix. It is terribly hard to say goodbye to a pet. Love the pictures, a cute, stripy guy.

  62. Hate this news. So sorry for you guys. Sending peace your way.

  63. Adriana says:

    Lovely pictures. Our cats and dogs hate each other! I’ve had dogs and cats for the last 30+ years. Some have died naturally, one cat ran away, one cat got hit by a car. Unfortunately having pets means saying goodbye. Hang in there, it will get easier.

  64. kzerbey says:

    wow, thanks everyone, I have to admit that ever since Felix passed I’ve felt like I’ve needed to shed some tears but couldn’t, maybe with everything else going on have felt like I needed to “hold it together”. After reading all these comments it finally happened, and it’s amazing how much better I feel. We’ll give Bailey some hugs for everyone 🙂

  65. Amanda says:

    you’ll always have the footprints in the slab.

  66. Jennifer says:

    I’m so sorry for your loss. Like many of those who have left posts, I also have lost a beloved pet (also unexpectedly) and a piece of me died that day as well. Believe me when I tell you that it will get better and that you will be able to remember Felix with tears of joy and not grief. You made the right decision by giving him the life he needed. Our thoughts are with you.

  67. Kirk Ohly says:

    Lauren, you Kyle & Bailey are in my thoughts, its so hard to lose a pet, especially one who has integrated themselves into your daily life. I shed a tear for you and just remember that in time the loss will fade, but for right now it’s ok to hurt a little when you think of Felix.
    Thanks for the photos, I know that can be hard to, give Bailey an extra squeeze from me.

  68. Lilly says:

    Heart wrenching. So sorry, it is an awful feeling to say goodbye to a pet.

  69. Oh I’m so sorry! My heart goes out to you guys. I loved seeing the pics of Felix on the blog since he became part of the family. I know that you are going to really miss him and so will all of us that follow the Chezerbey’s. XO

  70. Sally says:

    So sorry to hear about this.

  71. Furpants says:

    Oh so sorry. I’ve been there, both with a kitty who refused to be indoors only, and the loss of that kitty. I still feel certain that my Cash was happier living for 6 years going outdoors than he would have been living 16 years indoors. He wanted his freedom. I’ve had many cats over the years and always try to make them indoors only, but some just don’t have the temperment for it. RIP little Felix, you were loved.

  72. Ingrid says:

    I’m so sorry for your loss. This post made me tear up. Losing a family member is never easy. I’ve never had a cat but my dog Alfie is a bit of an escape artist. Every time he gets out I panic, freak out, and feel like I can’t breathe until he’s home safe.

  73. carls says:

    Never commented before, but I’m so sorry about your kitty Felix. Love to your family.

  74. moietytxs says:

    I am so sorry for your loss. We lost our Karma two years ago to a dog in the yard behind us, immediately after a miscarriage. I feel very fortunate that Sasha (a little over one year old, and arrived to us two weeks before baby #2) has been content to be inside almost all the time.

  75. honeybee says:

    I’m so sorry for your loss. I also have a cat who refuses to stay inside, I worry about him constantly, but keeping him inside is not an option. I have enjoyed seeing pictures of Felix and I will miss him. My heart goes out to your family. It is never easy saying good bye.

  76. Fat Cat says:

    Oh no. I’m so sorry for you guys ! I know it isn’t much of a consolation right now, but I’m sure Felix was very happy with you and Bailey.

  77. Dave says:

    🙁 It’s never easy to lose a pet. I’m sorry for your loss. He seemed so happy with Bailey.

  78. Anita Pedersen says:

    Adding my voice to the throng…I’m so sorry for the loss of your beautiful cat. I cried more intensely than I expected reading this blog. I’m another one who has read your blog for more than a year but never commented. Pets are such a joy, and their loss is terribly painful. I have lost many pets over the years, and each loss I’ve felt so keenly. I think your lives are really an example of the natural cycle, though – death so soon followed by a wonderful, new life. My prayers are with you all, give each other hugs and finish the basement for that baby!

  79. Ofelia, from México City says:

    I have been reading your blog, but this is the first time I write a comment. I know what are you feeling. We lost our Toti, several years ago, but sometimes I still miss him. So sorry.

  80. Alice says:

    I’m so sorry for your loss. It\’s true, there are rare cats that cannot function indoors and become self-destructive. Others are just bored and need to be entertained.

    Maybe it is too soon, but a lot of times a new pet helps you heal. Maybe you could adopt a cat at your local shelter/animal rescue group and they can give you advice on character and pick the right one for you, so that he/she is an indoor cat that likes dogs.

    I lost my first cat when she turned 15 years old and my new cat helped me get over the pain, although I still miss my Fonzie.

  81. cheri says:

    Oh. I stopped in to see if the baby was here and found out, instead, that you lost one. I’m so sorry.

    Years ago, our cat, Wally, was hit by a car. He wasn’t killed and I swore to the vet that from now on he would be an inside cat. The vet told me not to do that to him. It would ruin his quality of life.

    You made Felix’s life heaven.

  82. Jacey says:

    Sorry to hear about Felix 🙁 It’s always sad to loose a pet, no matter how long they’ve been with us. (And you’ve pretty much just re-enforced my decision to keep my cat as an indoor cat. She’s happy.. and there’s a busy road outside. I really don’t want to loose her like you lost Felix!)

  83. Catherine Rogers says:

    How hard it is to loose a pet. Felix sounded like a special character. We had a similar experience but our beloved cat was killed by a coyote, not a car. My heart goes out to you. Truly the circle of life in your house this month.

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